"he died of heartbreak," a resident told me this morning. he meant his fellow doctor who popped one too many sleeping pills two months ago(7/14/05 post). "his boyfriend since medical school," this blabby resident said, "shacked up with another man."
more die of heartbreak, so said saul bellow, than, perhaps, fulminant consumption or raging herpes. but what pushes one heartbroken soul over the edge and annihilate oneself? does, say, witnessing a lifeless pigeon on a train track make one wish to rot oneself and think of growing, perhaps, a pale headed mushroom on one's stomach like a still born fetus?
this afternoon, i woke up to someone making a racket out of my window. i looked out to see nobody below only the late summer sun on the deep, horizonless, afternoon sky still throbbing and smearing yellow stains on my room.
in the early evening, a cool salsa tune wafts in with the breeze from the other building. i saw the neighborhood blazed with lights like an airport runway to be left behind.
